It always seemed like a cruel statement when a flight attendant announced that parents were to secure their own oxygen mask before helping their child with their oxygen mask. The obvious reason is a dead parent cannot help a child. As our kids become adults it is more critical to put on our own oxygen mask to have any positive influence in their lives.
When we put forth our energy and efforts to “help” our children and neglect our own well-being we will become the casualty along with the child we are trying to help. Sometimes in a weird way the child will have an increased struggle to help the parent stay alive as well as deal with their own situation. Help is a fine line. Codependency is not help. Creating dependence rather than autonomy of our adult children can cripple them.